Saturday, December 03, 2005

Scott Stapp and 311 Brawl

stapp
RollingStone.com: Scott Stapp : Scott Stapp and 311 Brawl : News
Here is an awesome link from the Waynster!
At Baltimore's Harbor Court Hotel on Thanksgiving night, members of Los Angeles rockers 311, on a day off from their national tour, got into a fist fight with former Creed frontman Scott Stapp, in town to promote his solo debut, The Great Divide. 311 singer S.A. Martinez suffered a fractured knuckle as a result of the brawl, which the band says Stapp started.

This is priceless! Now, I'm not a big 311 fan. This being another sucko hippy band (they are too hippies, "amber is the color of you energy"?) that the Schram-man likes. However, I have now reassessed my opinion of the band and concluded they might not be so bad after all. I mean, the music still sucks, but anyone who puts the smackdown on our savior Stapp is the tits in my book. I'd even be willing to cut Paris Hilton some slack if she bitch slapped the incredibly hypocritical Christer poster boy.

So the short version of the article is this. Stappy show up at a hotel bar roaring drunk, throwing shot glasses and being an all around ass hat. Slappy proceeds to sucker punch one of the 311 hippies and in the process clips one of the band members wife. Resulting in a most un-hippy-like breaking of his hand off of Slappy's face.
But wait, it gets better. They beat ol' Scrappy to the ground and his girlfriend sits on his chest to get him to stop. Not that this deters our savior. He gets back up and the brawl resumes and ends with Scrappy (I kinda like the Scrappy-doo analogy) being kicked out of the hotel by security.

Read the full article for some choice quotes.

So, what have we learned children?

1. Scott Stapp is an ass hat (Props to Baa for the incredibly appropriate ass hat phrase).

2. Never hit someone with your hand! You might break your hand! Use a beer bottle (always a classic) or better yet, a chair. In Scrappy's case a bible or one of those big gold crosses would be excellent. For added fun you could scream "I'm smiting you!" while beating him with the cross.

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