A Wonka Willy - Make a Chocolate Clone of Your Penis

Live From AVN: This Ain't No Willie Wonka - Gizmodo

The latest version is the Chocolate Clone-A-Willy which lets you make a real milk chocolate copy that is 100% edible and, apparently, quite tasty. It’ll be available in about two weeks, so start scouting early so you’ll have time to make a copy of your manhood.

Just in time for Valentine's Day. Ummm....sweet! (Sorry, couldn't resist) Anyway, now you can give your woman (or man) an extra special package this year. I recommend having it sent to work in a gift basket to work. It is sure to be the talk of the office.

Don't miss the classic Clone-a-Willy and Clone-a-Pussy kits.

Make Your Own Mechanical Lockpick

lockpicking tools

You can now purchase an off-the-shelf lock picking tool, although these don’t come cheap. An alternative solution would be to build your own set of tools. Head on to Inventgeek to learn how a budget of $15 can snag you your very own set.

Pretty sweet. For $15 and about 30 minutes you can have your own mechanical lockpick.

DriveSync tracks your kids' joyrides

DriveSync tracks your kids' joyrides - Engadget

Nothing gladdens our hearts more than seeing yet another paranoid parent kid tracking device aimed at locking down the hearts, minds and loins of today's youth. This one provides off-line GPS tracking (read: cheaper than real-time) of your vehicle so you can see when, where, how fast and how aggressively your teen is abusing the family getaway-mobile. The data is tracked passively and stored in a USB key that plugs into the receiver unit and detaches to be read on your home computer. The data is uploaded to a DriveSync server where it gets interpreted, generating reports including trip logs and usage alerts

Oh boy! More Handy Stalker Tools! Yet I still get flak for being a privacy nazi. Go figure.

High Altitude Airship

High Altitude Airship (HAA)
This one's from the Schram-man

Lockheed Martin Maritime Systems & Sensors, Akron, Ohio is being awarded a cost reimbursable contract to build and demonstrate the technical feasibility and military utility of the High Altitude Airship. Under this contract, Lockheed Martin will develop an unmanned and untethered prototype airship with the requirement of remaining on station for one continuous month at a nominal cruise altitude. This prototype vehicle will also have a minimum payload capacity of 500 pounds with 3 kW of power. The total contract effort is estimated at $149,220,102. The principal place of performance will be at Lockheed Martin in Akron, Ohio and completion is expected by November 2010. The Missile Defense Agency is the contracting activity for contract HQ0006-06-C-0001

Ummm....so a blimp? Right. Cause nothing says missle defense like a blimp. Sorry, nothing says missle defense like a $150 million dollar blimp. Asshats.

The Experiment!

So I got me a Stanley "The Bolt" vacuum thermos for X-mas from The Wife. I figured, "Hey that's kinda cool. I wonder if it will actually keep my cofee warm?" So I trundled off to work the next day toting my new thermos hoping to have some decent coffee at work for a change.

I was guzzling nice hot coffee all morning. Then I got distracted by work and didn't have any coffee for a while. Five o'clock rolls around and I'm getting kinda wool headed.

"Aha! I'll try some of my nice coffee. I hope it is still warm."

Poured me a spot and took a big swig...and burned the crap out of my tongue!

Sure, sure laugh it up. I know someone out there is chuckling at my expense. "Well, dude, that is what a vacuum thermos does. You're like an idiot or something." Well, yes, I guess that is true.

Look, I understand intellectually that a vacuum doesn't transfer heat for shit. Really. I do too! Fine, be that way! I understand it intellectually, I've just never seen it in action before.

Anyway, I kinda have a thing for efficiency. Efficient things impress me. I dunno why, they just do. Might have something to do with me being incredibly lazy (which in my humble opinion is just me being extremely efficient). Needless to say, The Wife disagrees. She is wrong of course, but that is a different story.

I know, "Ummm that's nice dude, but what the hell is the point?!?!"

Fine, the point is I wanted to know how efficient it really was. Now if you are a complete uber-dork (like myself) the solution is obvious. It is time for an experiment! Muhahahaha! And this one won't be nearly as detrimental to my health as the last one.

So, on to the experiment...

Purpose:
Determine the heat loss over time from a vacuum thermos.

Hypothesis:
I believe there will be very little heat loss from the vacuum thermos. (Already partially proven by empirical evidence. See "I burned the crap out of my tongue" above)

Materials:
1 Stanley "The Bolt" vacuum thermos ($20-$30 at Target)
1 Digital Probe Thermometer (Pyrex Pro Digital Thermometer)
Water run through standard coffee maker. (Well, I ain't wasting real coffee on no damn experiment)

Procedure:
1. Fill thermos with hot water from the coffee maker.

2. Take initial temperature reading.

3. Take temperature readings every 1 hour.

4. Take final temperature reading after 24 hours have passed.

Observations:

Ambient Teperature: 72-72F

Collected Data


Analysis:

Coherent Light is a complete dork. While this is a true statement it is tempered by the interest The Wife took in the experiment. After calling me a complete uber-dork (Slight paraphrasing, but that was certainly the point of the remarks), The Wife was hovering over my shoulder during the first few measurements. She even badgered me when she wasn't hovering over the shoulder.

"What was it?"

"Oooooh, now your interested. Well piss off, you called me an uber-dork! Biotch!"

Ok, fine, there was some slight paraphrasing involved in the dialog as well.

Anyway, back to the experiment. Total heat loss over 24 hours was 47 degrees. The average temperature loss over 24 hours was 1.95833 degrees per hour. Look, I have a graph!


Here is a graph with the observed data (in Red) and the projected heat loss with a constant value of 1.95833 (in Blue).


As you can see, the data is pretty close. Why isn't it dead on? Most likely because of instrument error. Don't get me wrong, I love my probe thermometer. It is completely awesome for doing indirect grilling or smoking. However, after about 2 years of use I've noticed it does tend to read a couple of degrees low.

The next uber-dork experiment I intend to use a Thermoworks Thermapen. Pretty much the only instant read thermometer worth buying. Yeah, at $80 it is expensive, but it is accurate to .5 degrees and it is 90% accurate after one second (99.9% accurate after 3 seconds).


Conclusion:

First. I am a bit of a dork. We knew that, but it should be stated for the record.

Second. This was pretty cool. The Wife being as interested in the results was the biggest suprise of the experiment.

Third. Vacuum thermos's (thermoses, thermosi?) keep stuff pretty damn hot.

Fourth. I really want me a Thermapen.

TV in the bedroom halves your sex life

TV in the bedroom halves your sex life - study - Yahoo! News

A study by an Italian sexologist has found that couples who have a TV set in their bedroom have sex half as often as those who don't.

"If there's no television in the bedroom, the frequency (of sexual intercourse) doubles," said Serenella Salomoni whose team of psychologists questioned 523 Italian couples to see what effect television had on their sex lives.

On average, Italians who live without TV in the bedroom have sex twice a week, or eight times a month. This drops to an average of four times a month for those with a TV, the study found.

Ahhhh, listen to the sound of TV's flying out the window. Hmmm...If a TV in the bedroom has this effect, I wonder what would happen if I got rid of the TV entirely?

The Blogger's Dictionary

 
The Raw Feed-The Blogger's Dictionary

Blog:
(1) An unforgivably ugly sounding word. (2) A collection of writings which usually lives up to the sound.

Blogger:
(1) A diarist in search of an audience. (2) A patient in search of a therapist but unable to pay by the hour.

Blogging:
The act of pissing in the wind without experiencing relief to the bladder.

Amazingly accurate definitions of common blogging terms. Very funny.

Kegs for Cash

Tampa Bay's 10 News-Man charged with stealing empty beer kegs

Tampa, Florida - A self-employed construction worker with a thirst for recycling was arrested this week.

The Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office says he's charged with helping himself to empty beer kegs from bars and restaurants and selling them for scrap stainless steel.

About a dozen empty kegs were found in the truck of the suspect, Eddie Nelson Perez, 40, of Tampa, when deputies put him under arrest Thursday morning.

They say more than 100 empty kegs have been stolen in the past two months.

Each had an estimated value of $40.

Now that is a novel approach to recycling. Happened in Florida of course. Why, oh why, does this kind of shit always happen in Florida?

Dell's XPS Mobile Concept PC

Hands On with Dell's XPS Mobile Concept PC - Engadget

It's a fully functional prototype PC, weighing in at 18 pounds, with a 20-inch display, sporting 8 speakers, and running Windows XP Media Center Edition. It's got a Bluetooth keyboard along with a matching Bluetooth remote, has DVI output for adding additional displays, and supports both dual hard drives and dual-core processors.

Now that is a portable LAN party machine. Very slick.

Buffalo TeraStation 1TB NAS

Buy.com - Buffalo TeraStation 1TB NAS-RAID 1, 0 & 5 Back-up - HD-H1.0TGL/R5

Product Description - Buffalo TeraStation Terabyte Network Attached Storage - hard drive array
Device Type - Hard drive array
Total Storage Capacity - 1 TB
Dimensions (WxDxH) - 6.6 in x 8.7 in x 9.5 in
Weight - 15.9 lbs
Hard Drive - 4 x standard 250 GB
Storage Controller - RAID - ATA-133 - RAID 0, 1, 5
Networking - Network adapter - Ethernet, Fast Ethernet, Gigabit Ethernet

Yrah, I know. You've seen this before. But you haven't seen this price before. One Terabyte of network attached storage...$699.95. Get'em while they're hot.

The Carson NM-1 NiteMax night vision viewer

The Carson NM-1 NiteMax night vision viewer - Engadget

...the Carson NM-1 NiteMax will give you a bright and clear picture in even the darkest conditions, and display it on the built-in 2.5-inch grayscale LCD screen. But if the screen's not enough for you, the RCA video output jack will let you connect the NiteMax to your camcorder or VCR so you can make a permanent record of whatever it is that's so important it can't wait until daytime. Buy now and you can get it for the low, low price of $289.99.

Umm...yeah, it's for bird-watching. No really. Not to be used for stalking at all.

Now That's What I Call a Security Camera

THE RAW FEED

Artist Scott Kildall's GUN CONTROL is a security camera the National Rifle Association could love. Here comes the VIDEO.

Finally, a security camera for Baa. Check out the Video

Lexar JumpDrive Mercury - With E-Ink!

Lexar JumpDrive Mercury - Gizmodo

Lexar’s newest addition to its USB flash drives at CES is the JumpDrive Mercury. If you’ve ever had a problem with knowing how much storage space you have left on your drive, this Mercury takes care of that with an integrated capacity meter. In fact, this meter gives you the info you want without ever having to be plugged into your PC. The display, created by E Ink Corp, is paper-thin and unbreakable (for klutzes like me). The drive will come in 1GB and 2GB capacities.

Well, it looks like E-Ink is finally here. here is the first compelling product I've seen. Now you can tell at a glance if your thumbdrive is full or not. No power needed. An E-Ink reader/book is being released by Sony this April (in Japan)pictured below.



Very cool. I think I'll wait for the non-Sony version, on account of Sony being a bunch of ass hats.

Bulb-To-LED Conversion For Maglite

Bulb-To-LED Conversion For MAG - Gizmodo

Well if you or Johnny Law just can’t wait and demand the battery life and power of LEDs, this is for you. TerraLUX (hmm, perhaps they made the Luxor’s huge beam? That’s where the Gizmodo-ites are staying for CES, BTW. Stop by and ask for VV cause he’ll be taking clients all week!) has released a replacement LED conversion for Maglites that use AA or AAA batteries. The brightness and ability to focus the beam will stay the same and no mods are needed, so put that soldering iron down. A replacement bulb that uses an LED is $20

For those who can't wait until Mag finally releases their LED based flashlights. Now you can pick up a do it yourself kit for $20. Sweet.

InPhase to ship 300GB holographic drive

InPhase to ship 300GB holographic drive - Engadget

But the company has apparently come through, and has announced that its Tapestry drives will be available this year, using media developed in partnership with Hitachi Maxell. According to the company, the 130 mm discs will have a transfer rate of 20 megabytes per second, making them usable for media applications. Now if only we didn't have to wait another three years for InPhase's promised terabyte discs.

Finally! About freakin' time. I've mentioned this tech before a couple of times. Now we will finally see shipping products this year! W00t! Although it will be 3 years until the Terabyte drives arrive. Bastards.

Taiwan breeds transgenic, fluorescent, green pig - Yahoo! News

Taiwan breeds transgenic, fluorescent, green pig - Yahoo! News

aiwan, home to the world's first transgenic glowing fish, has successfully bred fluorescent green pigs that researchers hope will boost the island's stem cell research, a professor said on Thursday.
By injecting fluorescent green protein into embryonic pigs, a research team at the island's leading National Taiwan University managed to breed three male transgenic pigs, said professor Wu Shinn-Chih of the university's Institute and Department of Animal Science and Technology.

"There are partially fluorescent green pigs elsewhere, but ours are the only ones in the world that are green from inside out. Even their hearts and internal organs are green," Wu said on Thursday.

Ummm...green eggs and ham anyone? Seriously, I hope this is a joke. A glow in the dark pig? This is just too fucked up for words.

20-sided Fuzzy Dice

J!NX - 20-sided Fuzzy Dice Danglers

True, 6-sided fuzzy dice hanging from the rear view mirror may be overdone and cliche, but 20-sided dice, that is a different story. Time to replace that ratty, dangling high school tassel with something more fitting of a geek. Think of these fuzzy icosahedrons (that's a 20-sided polyhedron for the math-impaired) as a fantasy muse, inspiring you as you drive, conjuring images of dungeon crawling, orc whacking, and critical hitting.

Sweeeet. Nothing screams machismo like a pair of fuzzy dice hanging from the rear view mirror. Nothing except a pair of l33t 20 sided dice that is.

Warning! Displaying product in public may cause severe beatings and loss/lack of female companionship!

Hop-on's ChitterChatter GPS/cell watch

Hop-on's ChitterChatter GPS/cell watch - Engadget

Whether at work, home or traveling, simply use the Internet or any phone with SMS capabilities to quickly identify the location of the device within 300+ feet, in approximately 1 minute. The ChitterChatter Phone allows kids to stay in touch with close family and friends, or send their location by pressing the one-touch star button -- while letting parents manage costs.

Oh goody. More fun stalking...I mean kid saving devices. All for only $50.

More Handy Stalker Tools

Globatsat TR-101

Remote command control via mobile phones and/or through online software.
• Receive phone calls to have two way communications.
• Monitors can track the person without interfering him, LIVE! Real-Time tracking!
• Locate the locator holder with just a press of a button on PC software or through mobile phone via SMS (short messaging system).
• Report device holder’s position at a preset time interval.

More fun toys to stalk the Ex. Why the nice fun color scheme? To make "the children designs more fun to use."

Since I've been running across more and more Handy Stalker Tools lately (and beacuse I am too lazy to search for all the links from the old posts)I have started a sub-blog! So head on over and visit Handy Stalker Tools!

Rise and shine scumbags! Drill Sergeant Alarm Clock

Rise and shine. - The Red Ferret Journal

After a bugle plays “Reveille,” your personal drill sergeant clears the cobwebs from your brain with an inspiring round of orders you can’t fail to obey. LCD display provides you with time, alarm time, and date. Alarm with snooze button sounds with bugle, drill sergeant, or AM/FM radio (when you’re off duty, of course).

Now this is pretty cool. However, this would be way cooler if they had used the Sgt R Lee Ermey dolls instead of some generic drill sarge. We want The Gunny!

Make sure to check out the Xtra Salty R. Lee Ermey 12" figure too.

RIAA Hell: Automatic Wireless MP3 Sharing

THE RAW FEED: RIAA Hell: Automatic Wireless MP3 Sharing

The Viktoria Institute in Gothenburg, Sweden, is working on a concept they call PUSH MUSIC, which is software that automatically shares music files with nearby users who have similar tastes. It monitors the listening history of the user, and develops awareness about what kind of new music he might like. The concept envisions Wi-Fi-enabled music players that automatically establish a peer-to-peer connection, enabling people to either "browse" the music collections of others and take a copy of whatever they like, or -- here's the magic part -- just automatically recieve music the software has selected for you.

Oh my, that is bound to get the RIAA panties in a knot. I must admit, automagic connections make me a little leery. Cause like no one would use that to send viruses or anything.

You Might Also Like...

Wal-Mart: Error to Blame for MLK Link - Yahoo! News

Human error is to blame for an offensive link at Wal-Mart's Web site that recommended a film about Martin Luther King Jr. to potential buyers of a "Planet of the Apes" DVD, the retail company said Friday.

A business manager had grouped "Martin Luther King: I Have a Dream" with three other black-themed movies and assigned the package an overly broad category of DVD boxed sets, Cast said.

So when an online visitor looked at a listing for the boxed DVD set "Planet of the Apes: The Complete TV Series," the black-themed movies appeared under "similar items."

When recommendations go awry. I'm suprised something like this hasn't happened before. I hope the poor manager didn't get canned for this one. Bad enough he has to work at Walmart, but to get fired because recommendation engines aren't politically correct would really suck. Expect to see more of this in the future. Or better, expect to see people bitchin' about the meta tags on the image. "African-American, MLK, No-Monkeys"

Keeping the Family Jewels Safe

productdose.com - Keeping the Family Jewels Safe

Here it is, a product that at least one of us in the office thinks is the most ridiculous item we’ve ever featured on productdose (and we’ve had some killers). The Brief Safe works on the basic premise that no burglar would think to look in a stained pair of briefs for money. But, of course, you were clever enough to hide your cash in the Brief Safe’s 4″ x 10″ secret compartment, which comes complete with Velcro closure. Vulgar genius or genius-ly vulgar? Your call.

Ummm...wow. Looks like the week for seriously gross stuff. Brilliant, but way nasty.

Update - See Through Hard Drive

New WD Hard Drive Aimed At Modders

The Raptor X, which incorporates many of the features WD has included in its enterprise line of hard drives, trades performance for size: the 150-GByte SATA drive spins at 10,000 RPMs. In a unique twist, the drive also includes a clear cover, so that modders can show off the internals of the drive itself.

I freakin' love CES. Yeah, 10,000 rpm blah...blah...blah. You can actually see the insides while it is running! I can foresee hours of staring at the spinning platters while running a defrag. Then again, I am a complete dork.

Update - Check out the mackin' video.
All for only $350. I must have one!

The Chastity Belt

The Chastity Belt Page

First of all: what is a chastity belt?

Well, my dictionary say: "chastity belt, closable belt to save the wives chastity in absence of her husband (15.-19. century)."
We may define a chastity belt as a mechanical device wich prevents its wearer from having sexual intercourse.

Aha! Finally a solution for my daughter. Slap one of these on and no more worries about the boys starting to sniff around her.

Skywalk 4,000 Feet above Colorado River

gizmag Article: Hualapai Tribe Building Skywalk 4,000 Feet above Colorado River

The Hualapai Tribe is building a Skywalk over the Grand Canyon (pictured) to enhance the tourist experience. The Skywalk, opening by the end of the year, goes right along with the "Dream" and "Think Big" theme.

The glass-bottom 130-foot horseshoe-shaped bridge cantilevers over the edge of the Grand Canyon, 4,000 feet above the Colorado River and will protrude 60 feet from the rim at its extremity.

Well, learn you something everyday. Today I learned that glass walkways + 4000 feet = C. Light with major heebie-jeebies.

Maglite Going LED

Maglite Going LED - Gizmodo

Maglite, makers of all things police and security guards use, is venturing out into the world of LEDs. Seems a brighter, better MAG is in the works, as the company’s website is saying that in early 2006, MAG will start introducing MAG-LED products with LED technology. Made for both professional and consumer use, the new MAGs will be stylish, brighter, and are designed to last a lifetime.

All I can say is, about fucking time. I love my Maglites, but those bulbs suck.

Cornice drives get smaller, beefier

Photos: Cornice drives get smaller, beefier | CNET News.com

Cornice's Dragon series of micro hard drives feature 8GB and 10GB of storage and are about the size of a book of matches. They're aimed at smaller portable devices such as MP3 players and cell phones.

Cornice's Dragon Tail micro hard drive lets you carry 8GB of extra storage space in your pocket. The company says its USB drive is based on the smallest-ever personal storage reference design.

CES started this week and the new gizmos are starting to roll out. I still can't believe they can get hard drives this small. Anyone remember these bad boys?

What's Grosser Than Gross?

Rare Gourmet Coffee Kopi Luwak Most Expensive Roast Rarest Coffee on Earth

The Palm Civet or marsupial luwak of Indonesia a tree climbing animal that ranges in weight from three to ten pounds uses it’s sense of smell and eyesight to seek out it’s favorite treat the ripest coffee cherries. The Palm Civet or Luwak passes the cherry through the digestive track where the beans exit the animal basically intact. The beans are then patiently harvested from the forest floor near coffee plantations carefully cleaned and roasted.

So, a while back you might have seen the article I posted on "Gourmet" regurgitated weasel coffee. Pretty freakin' gross right?

Nope. Here is an even better blend. This one has been consumed and shit out by a marsupial (you can read that as a fucking rat). It apparently has a "rich, heavy flavor with some hints of caramel or chocolate."

I'm just gonna leave those quotes alone. That would be easier then banging Paris Hilton or snatching a sandwich from Mary Kate.

Update - Quad SLI from Dell and Nvidia!

Clubbing Baby Seals...: Quad SLI from Dell and Nvidia!

This new limited edition XPS uses no less than four GeForce 7800 GTX 512MB graphics cards. That's right, it's quad graphics. Two of the cards are plugged into two x16 PCIe graphics slots in the nForce 4 based custom Dell motherboard, and the other two slave off those two. The GeForce 7800 GTX 512MB cards are custom made for Dell, and run at a slightly lower clock speed than standard 7800 GTX 512MB cards, but higher than the 256MB cards. The point of all this graphics power? To drive Dell's new 30" ultra hi-res LCD monitor, which sports a resolution of 2560x1600.

Some more specific info on the new Dell XPS "Renegade". (Sorry, had to put the quotes there, "Renegade" is kinda silly don't ya think?)

New Battlestar Galactica Tomorrow

SCIFI.COM | Battlestar Galactica
A timely reminder via Baa.

New episodes of Battlestar Galactica starts tomorrow (1-6-06) at 10:00pm EST so set those DVR's.

Quad SLI from Dell and Nvidia!

Quad SLI from Dell and Nvidia!

Imagine tearing through today’s most advanced PC games with an unheard of 41 gigapixels per second of raw graphics performance, 5.2 teraflops of compute power, 96 pixel pipes, and an astounding 2 GB of on-board graphics memory. Nothing can stop you when you have this kind of hardware on your side.

Now imagine yourself doing all of this at extreme HD resolutions with everything turned on. A Quad-SLI PC lets you run your favorite games at an unbelievably high resolution of 2560x1600 while maintaining silky smooth frame rates. In addition, support for a new 32x antialiasing mode and 16x anisotropic filtering enables stunning visuals.

Daaaaaaaammn! Does anyone even have a monitor that will run that?!? This is just sick!


Here are some links.

Dell's site
Nvidia's site

The Speed Trap You Can't Avoid

Astucia Products and Technologies

With Astucia's Traffic Management suite of Intelligent Road Studs (IRS), collecting road traffic data couldn't be more simple or effective. Using a combination of an IRS detector stud and an IRS camera stud positioned in the carriageway, details of the speed. Volume and classification of traffic can be gathered for immediate transmission, via GPRS link, to the local/regional traffic control centre for analysis and future use in planning and maintenance.

What the hell are these thingamajigs you are asking yourself. First, no one says thingamajigs any more. Seriously, you really gotta get with the times. Second, they are a new toy from our jolly blokes over in England. They are designed to be embedded into the road so they look like lane markers. So what?

So, the one on the left is an IR device that can determine the speed (even determine the number of axles) of a passing vehicle. The one on the right is a itty bitty camera. Did I mention you can link them together? Yup, Baa is doing 90 past Mr. IR sensor and Mr. IR sensor tattles to the camera and click...his ticket is being mailed before he gets home.

Not cool.

Cheery Ho's

Strange New Products: Internet Porn Flakes

More than just a funny box, it's real cereal. They are sold in single-serve 7/8 oz. (24g) and 1 1/4 oz. (35g) boxes, respectively.

This reminds me of a time in junior high school, a friend of mine kept joking about a brand of cereal called, "Queerios". "Pour milk on 'em and watch them eat each other", he would say.

Check out their other funny kinky cereal varieties like "Cheery Ho's" and "Great Nuts". All real stuff.

Cheery Ho's is ,naturally, my favorite. I'm all about the bitches and ho's. Make sure to check out the soaps and breath mints too!

R/C Missile Launcher Tank!

Megatech Mega Missile Launcher Tank

In defense of a free neighborhood, patrol the perimeter of your backyard with flashing lights, dirt-throwing tank treads and exciting audio effects that include “Gunnery Sergeant” order request and missile launch sounds.

The radio control MEGA Missile Launcher vehicle moves in forward and reverse and can do 360-degree spins in true evasive maneuver battle tank fashion. The mobile tank platform can handle rough terrain and climbs a 30-degree slope.

The missile turret elevates to 45-degrees, rotates 350-degrees left and right and launches 10 foam missiles up to 15-feet either one at a time or all at once for a massive thunder attack. You’ll get a mega-load of military fun with the fully assembled MEGA Missile Launcher.

For those looking to trump Clubbing Baby Seals US exclusive review this is pretty much the only way to do it. The only way to top Usb is to go R/C baby. Seriously bad ass.
Props to Cartman for this one.

Snakes on a (Mother-fuckin') Plane

Snakes on a Plane (2006)

On board a flight over the Pacific Ocean, an assassin, bent on killing a passenger who's a witness in protective custody, let loose a crate full of deadly snakes.

It doesn't get any better than this. Sam Jackson's new movie is...wait for it...Snakes on a Plane. Brilliant! The movie is already collecting a cult following and it hasn't finished post production yet. Props to Wired Magazine for this one.

Wind Surfer Toilet Bowl Cleaner

Strange New Products: Wind Surfer Toilet Bowl Cleaner

New from German-based company Henkel Wasch-und Reinigungsmittel GmbH comes this cool little toilet bowl cleaner and deodorizer in the shape of a wind surfer.

It hangs onto the rim of the toilet and surfs the porcelain waters keeping it clean and odor free. The cleaning agent is held inside the surfer, while the deodorant is inside the sail.

Heh. Well, I wasn't gonna pass up posting this one now was I?

Zalman CNPS9500 LED heatsink/fan

Zalman CNPS9500 LED heatsink/fan :: SilentPCReview.com

Zalman made a name for itself with highly efficient CPU heatsinks that work well with low airflow — an excellent combination for low noise. Their original "flower" design was a stroke of genuis: Many thin fins clamped very tightly together along one edge, which was then machined to a fine polish to become the base. The unattached opposite ends of the fins was spread apart to allow airflow between them. At the time, it was an inexpensive way to make a very high performance heatsink. It spawned many copycats, and several other companies adopted similar designs. Imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery, but it is probably keeping Zalman's patent lawyers busy.

Say hello to my next Cpu cooler. Wicked cool looking and 30db at the highest setting...and it has blinky lights. Sweet. Check out Zalman's other products here.

One Remote to Rule Them All

Om Malik on Broadband : One Remote Fits All

Florida-based OpenPeak is about to introduce a brand new remote (most likely at CES) that can do it all. According to their PR firm, “Simple Remote, is part movie/IM command screen, part electronic program guide, part VoIP phone, and an all-in-one remote that controls appliances, TVs, garage doors, and stereos. It’s WIFI enabled and music can be streamed to it by using headphones.” Sounds a tad too much, but it sure would be nice to get rid of everything that clutters the coffee table….

This is one seriously bad ass remote. I want one.

How to up the testosterone in da kitchen! Part 2

Clubbing Baby Seals...: How to up the testosterone in da kitchen!
Making the kitchen safe for men or pimp out your mixer.

I could have sworn I posted this before but after searching the archives a couple times I couldn't locate it. So, here it is again. Das Uber Stand Mixer. Looking for more macho stuff in da kitchen? Check out part one.

Review! - USB Air Darts!

Clubbing Baby Seals...: USB Air Darts!

Powered by your mac or pc, you'll have hours of flying fun with these USB air darts. Let the mission begin!

* Control the aim and the firing mechanism of the darts via your computer mouse
* Cylindrical base
* 3 darts
* USB powered
* Software included

A Clubbing Baby Seals Exclusive (and a US exclusive too I might add)! Major props to Baa and his family on this one. Baa sister was recently in the UK and picked up two of these bad boys for us (on account of Baa telling his sister if she tried to enter the US with out one he was calling Homeland Security and reporting her as a terrorist).

Now the review.

Summary:
Totally freakin' bad-ass mo-fo!

Cons:
Not USB powered (the batteries included kinda tipped me off on this one).
Only has a 180 degree horizontal traverse (geek translation: only turns in a half circle).
Only shoots about 10-15 feet.

Pros:
Maybe you weren't paying attention. It's a freakin' USB controllable missile launcher!

Seriously, this thing is so bad ass it's almost inconceivable (and yes, that does mean what I think it means). If you have the means, I highly recommend picking one up.

WARNING! This can seriously piss off wives and co-workers! You won't really give a shit, but after the 30th time or so they start getting annoyed.

Conclusion:
Get one! This is one of the coolest toys ever!

P.s. Almostr forgot. They also have a really cool slogan on the bottom of the packing material.

"We do not stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing."

Hillsborough: 'Sexual' school clubs decried

Hillsborough: 'Sexual' school clubs decried

An effort to ban Gay-Straight Alliance clubs from Hillsborough County schools accelerated Tuesday when a group of parents wheeled a child's wagon to the front of a School Board meeting.

Inside the wagon were petitions, wrapped in red ribbons, signed by about 1,100 people who object to the school district's allowing Gay-Straight Alliances. The petitions asked board members to ban the clubs, which meet some school days in a handful of Hillsborough high schools, including Newsome and Brandon.

Alice Wilkinson, who has two children at Newsome, delivered the petitions and urged board members to learn more about the clubs. She said she represents parents who believe the "sexually oriented" clubs are inappropriate for students and violate the district's policy of teaching abstinence.

"We are not a group of right-wing anything," she said. "It's so easy to jump to the conclusion we are against gay people."

And in local news. More gay bashing. In Florida. Again. Why, oh why, do I have to live in the asshat capital of the world?

I love the quote. We don't hate them, we just don't want them to get married, have parades, or clubs. Serious asshats.

Bonny Boy Drink Fountain

productdose.com - Bonny Boy Drink Fountain

There’s a magical point in most nights that revolve around drinking where the absurd and the vulgar mix with a call to fill ‘er up yet again. It’s been a while since we’ve seen an item that so perfectly captures this moment, but here it is. Based upon the Belgian Manakin Pis statue/fountain, the Bonny Boy Drink Fountain so closely resembles more than one cross-cultural taboo that you might want to wait until your guests are well sloshed before bringing this one out.

Well, I certainly could have used this for New Years. Fill it full of Big Black Dick Rum and have some real fun. "Would you like some Big Black Dick from a little boy?" Always a good way to start a conversation.

Vibrating Hairbrush

Sarcastic Sex Toy Blog: Review: Vibrating Hairbrush

Vibrators and hairbrushes are both useful, if unrelated, devices. Much like, for instance, crankshafts and spoons, or birdcages and avocados. These are items that do not merit combination. Yet, for just ten dollars: the Vibrating Hairbrush.

Ahem. I guess this is one way to make sure nobody uses your hairbrush.